Winter Blues (Open)

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Oliver wasn't going to lie to himself: he didn't want to be here. Part of him had come because his Durmstrang days were over, which meant he had to get out of his dorm and enjoy the company of his old friends, like Victoria. Another part of him had begged him to not attend because Victoria had most likely gone to her mother's London home for the holidays, and also Matthew was probably still mad at him. Oliver could live without the Norwegian beauty, but he couldn't exactly live with his brother giving him the cold shoulder. All in all, the negative side of the situation won. Oliver was dreading his earlier decision. He stood with his back to the wall of the Great Hall, which was decorated according to the festivity, with a cup of eggnog in hand. His hair was uncombed, messy to the point of possible homelessness, and he wore a baby blue button up with jeans and Converse: the most basic of clothes.

To say that Oliver had changed after returning from Durmstrang was an understatement. Oliver might as well be an entirely new person. That school had it's ways, and they were much more real than he would have liked them to be. Still, the Ollie side of him, the one that was still left, kept trying to make an effort to go back to his old self. He did so right now by observing the people around him, something that Oliver had always enjoyed doing. Of course, his reasons were different before. Back then, he observed in order to know, to be part of something. Now, he observed simply because he was bored. There was a multitude of Hufflepuff first years he had already met, unfortunately. Since he had offered his help to decorate the Great Hall, he had met most of them as he carried boxes for the girls in his year and helped put up ornaments and everything for the younger kids. He'd grown up, definitely, and he often found that he wasn't sure what to do with his legs anymore.

He was now five feet and eleven inches, which was insane to him. He didn't even realize he had grown, all of a sudden his jeans had somehow shrunk. He wondered if Matthew would grow up as much as he had, but he figured his brother might even grow taller as the Slytherin had always been much bigger than Oliver. Even now, as he awkwardly stood by himself, Oliver probably stood out as a giant among the rest of the students. Or at least it felt that way. He felt that way. The few older students that had arrived were in Slytherin and Ravenclaw, he could tell because he'd seen some of them with Victoria at some point.

Turning his blue eyes from the people, people that he didn't feel like talking to, Oliver settled on the food table. He hadn't made any of it, hadn't even helped make it. Surely there must be something good, though, because the house elves usually went above and beyond with their cooking. He didn't walk over, he just looked at the food - there were the traditional turkey sandwiches that some of the younger kids ate by the dozen, apple pies, chocolate cakes, the famous butterbeer, hot chocolate, roast chicken and beef, pudding, various Honeydukes candy and one giant turkey in the middle of the table. Oliver almost lost his breath only trying to name all the foods in his head.

All in all, everything looked nice. Everything was red and white, very Christmas-like. There was fake snow falling from the enchanted sky, snow that never actually touched the ground. There were stars in the sky, as well. Everything was somehow sparkling, and even though Oliver had helped carry the decoration, he had never actually looked at them. Most importantly, everyone was laughing and being happy, and suddenly Oliver missed his brother.

*I had to respond  *

Out of all of the unpleasant ways to wake up in the morning - being stomped on by your cat had to be in the top five. Victoria yawned as furry paws shuffled across her face and down to her chest, where the siamese cat found her perfect resting spot. With squinted eyes, the Ravenclaw glanced at the window and saw the bright morning sun rise. Yes, rise. For someone that usually doesn't bother to get out of bed before noon, this was quite the rare site. And while she might have considered getting up and taking the time to appreciate the full beauty of the sunrise, Victoria quickly gave up on that idea. After all, that would require actually getting out of bed. Which she definitely wasn't planning to do. Not today.

Having completely forgotten that the cat was still on top of her, she rolled onto her side and stretched her arms up into the air. The siamese growled unhappily when she was pushed away and forced to find a new sleeping spot. "You'll get over it", she mumbled still half asleep, dismissing the growl completely. After a few twists and turns, she gave up on the idea of continued sleep and slowly pulled herself out of bed. If she was up, she might as well have the only thing that was worth waking up for in the morning - coffee. She pulled out a cup out of her desk drawer and took the bag of instant coffee beans her mother would sent her every month. With a simple flick of her wand, the water in her cup would heat up to the perfect temperature and mix with the coffee beans on the bottom of the cup - a little trick her dad had taught her. So there she was, all alone in her room, with her favorite shirt that had 'sleep solves everything' plastered on the middle of it, hugging her cup of coffee and watching the sunrise. 

This was going to be the first Christmas she would spend without her family. Well not really, if you counted the fact that her dad hadn't came to see her during a holiday since the divorce. But the first time she would spend Christmas without any of her family members. Her mother had booked a trip to the Dominica Republic with her aunt, which Victoria had suggested in the first place. The poor woman was so overworked and stressed that only a long vacation somewhere far away would fix it. Her dad was working somewhere overseas as always. And Anthony was... well Anthony. So this summer she was left to her own devices. Which was fine of course, since she was old enough to take care of herself. She didn't need to be looked after and spoiled with presents and food. But still, it felt a bit strange. Different.

After downing her coffee, Victoria tied her hair, which she still kept purple for an unknown reason, into a long braid in an effort to look presentable. Perhaps presentable was pushing it a bit too far. Not completely homeless was more the look she was going for. She changed into dark black jeans but didn't even bother to change her shirt before heading downstairs to the Great Hall. No one was going to see her anyway, all of her friends were away for the holidays so she really didn't see a point in trying. Waking into the hall, the Ravenclaw took a minute to observe and take everything in - the festive colors, the decoration, the food, the funny sweaters and the laughing faces. It only made her miss her family even more. Glancing to the right, she saw that she wasn't he only one who was analyzing the view. 

Standing next to her was a tall, dark haired boy wearing a Hufflepuff uniform. Which was strange because she didn't seem to recognize him. And he was bound to be around Victoria's age or so. As the boy attention was directed towards the hall, she took a minute to look at him. Next to his button up shirt and jeans, Victoria felt like she looked homeless. Shrugging her shoulders, she was about to just walk away and find an empty seat until she recognized that messy frock of dark tangles. Leaning back on the wall, the Ravenclaw smiled to herself and continued to observe the hall. "I never really liked the whole red, green and gold. Like something that would come out of a weird Slytherin and Gryffindor love affair, if both involved were also cousins. So the end product ends up being just a bit more... deranged. But maybe that is just me."

Oliver was not paying much attention to the people around him, rather his gaze was directed towards the people in front of him. When a voice spoke up, he kept his eyes to the ones who seemed to be having a good time. Mostly, he just listened to the girl talk about Gryffindors and Slytherin getting mixed up together and producing red, green and gold. Oliver chuckled as he thought about how right she was, and he figured he might as well glance at her briefly to be polite. Her purple braid should have been enough for Oliver to recognize her, but he had grown used to talking to her only via letter that the three second glance was like déjà vu.

"Yeah, Slytherin's got to keep it pure, doesn't it?" He joked, recognizing Victoria. A wave of relief passed through him as he looked at her. She was a friend, that was good. Great, actually. Automatically, he moved closer to her and flashed her a smile. Oliver would have hugged her, let her know how much he had actually missed her, but there were two very good reasons why that wasn't an option. One, he was much taller than her now, and his arms were naturally longer and he still wasn't used to that. "How come you're not with your mum?" He asked her, raising an eyebrow with curiosity. It seemed odd for her to have stayed at Hogwarts, and he suddenly worried that something may be wrong. He refrained from asking further, not sure whether it would be polite or not.

Turning his eyes from her, he realized the fuzzy feeling he usually got from being around her wasn't there anymore. His usual worrying about his hair and clothing was the last thing on his mind, because he was only worried that he wouldn't be able to continue a friendship with Victoria. Notba real one, at least. Not like before. Sighing, he said, "I brought you something. From Norway." That made it sound like it was some sort of traditional Norwegian object, so he added, "It's chocolate." He gave her a small laugh, but then remembered he hadn't actually brought it with him. "I didn't expect you to be here, so it's still in my trunk. I'll send it up to you later." Knowing Victoria, he knew that as Kong as it was chocolate, she would be happy. She was obsessed with the chocolate.

Changing the subject again, he said, looking at her. "I'm glad you're here. And that you actually recognized me." he laughed. "It's strange. You get taller and suddenly everyone claims not to know who you are." Was he talking too much? Probably. But, really, he wanted to talk to her. He wanted to have a good conversation with a friend rather than stay in his room and meditate. "I suppose I lost all that baby fat as well." he concluded, still at a loss that his former friends and classmates had looked at him curiously when he'd walked back into Hogwarts.

"Thank Merlin I am not a Slytherin. Who looks good in green anyway?" she chuckled as her head turned towards Ollie. His smile was familiar at least - the same goofy grin she remembered him by. His hair was similar as well, messy and untamed as always. But looking at the rest of him was like looking at a stranger. His face was more defined now, his jawline more chiseled and protruding at a sharp angle.  His light eyes stood out against the color of his skin and were almost demanding attention. How come she never noticed them before? And not to mention that he was towering over Victoria now, while not so long ago they were a similar height. 

Too busy analyzing this strange yet familiar person that stood next to her, Victoria had almost forgotten than the Hufflepuff boy had asked her a question. "Huh?", she asked trying to get her focus back to the conversion. "Oh yeah my mum. She's on holiday. Dominican Republic. My idea really. She needed a break. Besides, she really needs to get some sun. She was starting to look pale and too... well too English", she admitted with a laugh. Although it was a bit lonely spending the holidays without her family, she knew it was the best thing for everyone involved. Anthony and her dad couldn't bare to be in the same room together and her mom didn't deserve that kind of drama on her days off. "What about you? I expected you to be home as well. I thought I was spending Christmas all by myself"

"Chocolate? You brought me chocolate?", she asked as her eyes grew wide from excitement and a grin instantly plastered on her face. There were two things that the Ravenclaw girl could not resist no matter how hard she tried - coffee and chocolate. And seeing how she doubted that Norway had decent coffee beans to boast about, Ollie's gift was perfect. "Ollie! You know you didn't have to bring me anything. Thank you", she said with a beaming smile on her face. Leaning in, she was about to hug her friend but suddenly felt a bit awkward about it. Was it weird, would he mind? Because they haven't seen each other in such a long time and all. Without actually thinking it through, Victoria quickly switched from a hug to a very strange, low, one sided high five that she regretted instantly. "Thanks", she repeated awkwardly hoping he didn't notice what just happened.

"Come, let's eat! I am starving", she said pulling him towards the table. Food is always a great distraction. "Umm...yeah. You do look a bit different", she agreed as she was already eyeing a piece of apple pie that was placed in front of her. "But mainly taller. How did you do it? If there was a weird Norwegian growth spell ceremony involved, you know you could tell me about it right? I promise to keep your secret. Besides... I really could use a few extra inches", Victoria said with a smirk. It was useless trying to decide between the pecan and the apple pie so she just took a slice of both, put them on her plate and started happily munching away. "So tell me, how is it being back in England? It must suck."

Oliver chuckled once more as Victoria kept blurting out truths. All of a sudden, Oliver blurted out a truth of his own curiosity, "Your hair is still purple. Why?" Not that he minded, it was her hair after all, but he suspected she would have changed it back. Or maybe she had told him she would keep it, and he just couldn't recall it now. He noticed her staring, which wasn't that surprising as even his Aunt Rachel had stared at him for a while, making somewhat funny remarks about how he'd stretched up. Nevertheless, this wasn't his Aunt. This was Victoria. Just the thought of her paying so much attention to him made him uncomfortable. He felt his fingers tingle with awkwardness, and suddenly that common phrase about the elephant into the room made complete sense. Except the elephant wasn't just in the room, it was sitting between Oliver and Victoria.

When she answered his question about her mom, he smiled. "That's a nice gesture. Sending your mom on a break, I mean." He smiled a bit when she mentioned her mother was pale and turning into into an English lady, because...well, he was pale and so very English. Maybe Victoria didn't like pasty English people. Still, he couldn't help but point it out jokingly. "Hey, I'm pale and English. I don't see the problem." It wasn't so much that Oliver had gained confidence while at Durmstrang, but rather he had learned to control his childish behavior. The Norwegian school was very good as settling one's shit down. He'd even started to think of the S word in sentences, not outspoken ones, but his personal ones. "I should do that with my mom sometime. Except Matthew will probably go into hysterics and make me do his laundry." he frowned, immediately taking back his own suggestion. Washing his brother's dirty clothes was probably the worst punishment. He nodded as Victoria asked about his own family. "Yeah, I'm not much fun to be around anymore, or so Matthew says." he shrugged. "I'm just hoping he doesn't set any of my things on fire." his mind immediately brought him to the tree in their backyard, the one that Matthew so often abused when he was mad at Oliver.

The tree was helpless against Matthew's fire mania. Still, he forgot about the greenery when Victoria's mood changed at the though of chocolate. "Yeah, I had to. You're crazy about it!" he laughed. Agh, his insides twirled around him when he saw her excitement. Victoria was in some sort of blissful moment at the thought of something so simple, so common. And Oliver loved that. He always thought that brief moment of genuine, childlike enthusiasm she rarely showed was part of the reason he liked her so much. With her happiness, Oliver's blue eyes sprakled too. How could they not? Her mood was contagious. He caught the hug, or what would have been a hug. He was ready for it, too. Except it didn't happen. Oliver leaned in shortly after she did, but the hesitation in her face made him hesitate as well. He leaned back at the same time as she, and her very awkward high five brought the elephant back. She repeated her gratitude awkwardly, and Oliver just nodded before glancing away, trying to shake the whole situation away from his head.

Oliver wasn't hungry, but he followed her anyway. "Durmstrang shapes you, or reshapes you." Oliver replied, a strange llingering sadness in his voice, now unable to get the awkwardness away from him. Victoria didn't need any more inches. She was fine with her height, Oliver thought. "No, you really don't. Girls are supposed to be shorter than guys, anyway. From a biological point of view." He glanced around the table, really not feeling any of the food in front of them. Victoria had taken two slices of some pie, so he checked again and reluctantly grabbed a slice of cheesecake. Just a small one. He wasn't in the mood for throwing up in front of people. "It's alright. Mainly just having to convince Matthew that I love him." He admitted. Matthew had still not forgiven him for going away, which was getting a bit old for Oliver. "I missed London, though. Norway's amazing, but I was born in England. You know?" Surely, Victoria would understand. She was originally from Brazil, and even though England was a charm, it must have nothing compared to her home country.

"Huh?", asked Victoria with a confused expression on her face when Ollie questioned her hair color. "Oh! Right, my hair. Purple...", she said playing with the bottom part of her braid, inspecting the color as she spoke. "I don't know really. The color annoys way too many people for me to change it. And pissing off people just never gets old. Maybe I will change it to blue - house pride and all", the Ravenclaw said shrugging her shoulders. But what she didn't want to admit was that she had formed an emotional attachment to that specific hair color. It just reminded her of a time when she was more carefree. It reminded her of school, of her friends - especially Ollie. Why would she want to change that? Or give up that memory that sparks up every time she looks into the mirror? "Maybe I'll just keep it for now"

It wasn't that Victoria had anything against people that looked, well English, it was just that general paleness didn't suit some people. Like herself, who without a constant access to sunlight, would slowly but surely end up with glossy, transparent skin and corpse like features. And then people wondered why she was always facing a window at the slightest sign of sunlight. "Oh you know what I mean! You can get away with it - with the whole English thing. It suits you quite well actually. You manage to look handsome, pale and all! I can't say the same thing about my mom, or myself for that matter", she clearly stated without much thinking. Only after the words came out of her mouth did she wonder if the Hufflepuff would take offence to her words or see them as a compliment. 

Victoria had to face plenty of awkward situations before, but none of them prepared her for this. Why couldn't have she just hugged him? Or at least smiled and nodded in gratitude. Was that so difficult to do? Instead of the world's most awkward high five that anyone could ever imagine. Her eyes caught Ollie's gaze and she politely smiled back before changing the subject. "Oh don't worry, I won't let him burn anything here. I am head girl after all", she said with a goofy grin, flashing her badge. Maybe a change in topic was exactly what they needed to defuse the tension. And her becoming head girl was surely a safe topic as any. "Although I can't guarantee the safety of your things back home. I am head girl, but I'm not all powerful you know", she said with a teasing laugh. 

Eating through her two pieces of pie, she listened to Ollie talk about Durmstrang with a certain sadness in his tone. He must have really liked it there. And although just the thought seemed selfish, Victoria was glad that he didn't like it too much to try and stay there. She wasn't keen on losing her friends, even if it was to awesome castles in Norway. "Yeah...I can see that", Victoria said as she examined him yet again, as if she was trying to find bits and pieces of the old and new Ollie and trying to put the whole thing together. "For example I didn't know you had an opinion on girls' heights. From any point of view. But it's good to know that at least Darwin would be satisfied with my height, even if I am not", she said with a chuckle, wondering if he would understand her weird muggle joke. There were so many things she wanted to ask him - but couldn't find the strength. Did he regret coming back? Did he learn awesomely cool dark magic that wasn't allowed in Hogwats? Did he curse the weather for making his fingers freeze all the time? Did he meet amazing friends that helped him forget, even if just for a moment, the people at Hogwarts? Friends that helped him forget all about the purple haired girl that used to shove bottles of Firewhiskey into his hands and steal his chocolate every other day. She wanted to ask, but she didn't. "Yeah... home will always be home. But for me - I'm already home. Right here"

Chuckling, Oliver realized Victoria hadn't changed at all. Unlike Matthew. "Who finds it annoying?" Ollie asked mockingly. "Certainly not anyone who matters." he grinned. His smiled faded a bit when she mentioned changing it. "What? No. It looks cool as it is." Oliver replied, screw house pride and all that, purple was the color. Her color. Nodding after Victoria sort of decided to keep it, he smiled at her as if she knew that to him her hair color was, after all, a symbol. Every time Oliver saw something of that color, his mind instantly brought him to Victoria and that time she had exploded the ridiculous beauty book like a badass. He then thought about how he would probably have green hair now if he'd been brave enough to support Victoria in her craziness. But he had liked his dark hair too much to give it up for some trademark color. Green may be his favorite color, but Oliver was a coward when it came to changing his physical appearance. It would be like changing his blue eyes to brown.

"Yeah. I know what you mean." he half laughed. I get away with the English thing because I am English." he pointed out jokingly. He never really considered how Victoria looked when pale, he just knew she had what many girls considered to be "perfect skin" and even though Oliver agreed with that statement he wasn't really sure what it meant. "Besides, your skin is practically what every British girl wants. I mean, do you have any idea how red they turn when the sun comes out?" Of course, London was more rain than sun but he was still sure half of the city's population still burnt whenever there was a bit of it. His eyes widening, Oliver grinned when Victoria showed off her Head Girl badge. "That's amazing! Are you liking your new responsibilities?" he wanted to know. Of course he's thought about being Head Boy, but he wasn't one hundred percent sure he's get to be one since he'd gone away for a semester. Did that eliminate him from the list?

Suddenly, something occurred to him. He leaned back against the food table, his hands helping him keep stay in control so he wouldn't accidentally fall over all the food. "What am I going to do when you graduate?" He's never thought about that. Or rather, he always thought they'd be within reach. Sure, Victoria had at some point been in a different country than him but that was different because he had a timeline to follow. He knew exactly when he'd get a chance to see her again, and after she graduated and went on to do career training, he wasn't sure when she'd find time to see him. Not that he was going to force her to spend time with him, but he certainly wanted her to stay around. Wait, stay around. Shit. She could move back to Brazil.

"Don't move back to Brazil. Please." Ollie suggested, though he was sure it sounded more like a demand. "I mean, at least let me get a visa first so I can visit you. Because I don't think I could either fly or apparate that far away." For a moment, Oliver had forgotten they were talking about happier things, or at least less depressing than Victoria leaving. Her voice brought him back, and he suddenly remembered the height thing. "Well, yeah..." Oliver trailed off. "I mean, if I had a girlfriend, I don't think I'd like her to be taller than me. She's supposed to be a girl, not...you know." He was trying not to, but his mind was instantly brought back to Martha, her green eyes staring back at him from somewhere in the back of his mind. "I think Darwin would be satisfied with most of you." he said recklessly, because he was, in a sense, tired of hiding his compliments. He'd made the mistake of falling in love with Martha and showered her with as much love as he could, but this was Victoria. Victoria could and had handled it pretty well, even if by constantly rejecting him. In that moment, it occurred to him that he'd been in the friend zone for more than 5 years.

Home was right here. Something in Oliver softened, if it was even possible, and suddenly all thoughts of Norway and it's experiences faded, leaving only a kind of melancholy that he knew came from happiness more than it did sadness. Victoria wouldn't leave him, and as selfish as it was, he wanted her to stay forever. Or to at least be able to stay somewhere close, somewhere he could still call her up on a Saturday night and ask her to go get ice cream with him.