Conclusions (Agnes)

Talking to Ariel had calmed Hunter down enough to think rationally about the situation - enough to help him realize that this wasn't the end of the world. But in Hunter's opinion, it was pretty damn close. It was the end of part of his world, at least. But he'd thought that he'd at least come to some sort of state of acceptance about it. Enough that he'd stopped pacing his room and shouting at his dead brother. Even enough that he'd decided to make a trip down to the kitchens to get some food. But, the moment that he saw her, all of the progress that he'd made might as well have never happened. He turned a corner, and there she was walking in front of him. And all at once, all of the panic and anger that he'd felt before exploded in his chest. Instantly, his rational thinking disappeared completely, and he was speeding up. Catching up to her. Grabbing her by the arm and dragging her into the nearest empty classroom. Because holy fuck she was pregnant!

The moment they were inside, Hunter slammed the door behind him, leaning back against it so that she couldn't just leave. He didn't give a shit what Agnes did. She could jinx him, or slap him, or kick him in the balls, but she was not leaving this room until Hunter knew what the fuck was going on. For a moment, he just stared at her, and he couldn't help his eyes travelling to her stomach as he remembered what Victoria had said. She's already starting to show. In reality, Hunter wouldn't have noticed if he hadn't known to look for it. But, now that he knew, he could see it. And instantly the color drained from his face, and he looked up at Agnes, meeting her eyes. "You're pregnant," he accused in a hesitant voice. And then, after a moment of silence, he repeated himself, his voice more certain. "You're pregnant. You're fucking pregnant and you didn't even tell me!" he continued, his voice raising as anger and panic took over.

"Holy fuck, Agnes, why would you keep that from me?" he asked desperately, running both of his hands through his hair and abandoning the door without thinking about the possibility of her escaping. "Did you think I wouldn't find out? I mean, did you really think I wouldn't notice eventually?" he asked, almost shouting, pacing back and forth in front of her. It wasn't like Agnes could hide that she was carrying an extra human being forever. "Agnes, what the fuck are we going to do? I don't know how to take care of a kid, and I'll still be in school next year so I don't know how I'll be able to make enough and there's no way that Aoife will have anything to do with me after this and - But, even as he rambled on, his voice quick and panicked, he suddenly felt a huge sense of guilt wash over him. "And - " But again, he cut himself off. Because all of a sudden, it finally hit him just how much of a selfish git he really was. Like Aoife mattered - like he mattered - when Agnes was going through something so traumatic. And as if he wasn't already a git enough for getting her pregnant to begin with, now he was screaming at her for something that she had no control over. Something that she was probably more frightened about than him.

So, in that moment of realization, he stopped pacing and ran a hand through his hair once more, and took a completely different route. "And holy shit, Agnes, I'm sorry," he said finally, his voice sincere. "I'm so sorry, we never should have - I never should have -" Holy shit. "You should have told me, Agnes. Did you really think I'd want you to have to do this alone?"

Walking from the Common Room to any class was getting harder and harder. Agnes wasn’t athletic, she found it hard to keep up with the weight gain side effects of the baby-carrying deal. She wasn’t just eating for two, she was breathing for the two of them as well. Between sets of 6 or so steps, she had to stop for a second, slow down, and take a deep breath. Her most recent “motherly” mission consisted of figuring out what the name of this kid was going to be. It needed a name, surely, and her mother had pressured her into picking a decent name to go with her last name. Obviously, this kid wasn’t ever going to know he was fathered by some guy she hooked up after getting her heart broken, because what kind of bedtime story would that be? Agnes had picked out a middle name, mostly thanks to Ansel who’d liked it enough to not say it was the kind of name he’d get beaten up for. So, she walked over to the study rooms, for some peace and quiet where the possibilities of Hunter being around were slim, to give the naming a break and just take pictures. Whatever name she was supposed to pick, would come to her eventually. No need to rush it. And as she carried her camera around, she was stuck thinking of ways in which she could get out of Potions homework, maybe claiming that the fumes were or could be dangerous in her condition, when she felt a sharp grasp on her arm.

In a second, she was taken into one of the classrooms, and had she not been pregnant she might have kicked whoever it was, Agnes only attempted a feeble punch to his or her arm. It was pathetic, really. Shameful. She was no longer the ball-kicking badass french girl. She was just pregnant. As whoever her kidnapper was slammed the door shut behind them, Agnes prepared to let out the loudest, most hurtful screech, when she realized it was just Hunter. Staring at him, she held her camera in her hands and tried to give him an annoyed look. She knew what this was about. He had probably already heard, because had it been all on him he would have probably taken forever to figure it out. That, or he’d finally realized that she wasn’t fat for just eating lots of pizza rolls for Professor Wilcox’s class. When Hunter gave her some information about her condition, she rolled her eyes playfully, as if it was the funniest thing he'd ever said, “Really? I wouldn’t have know.” He accused her, as if this was something she had chosen herself and simply decided Hunter wasn’t worthy enough to know about it, as if he wasn’t important enough for her to let him in on this. Agnes stayed quiet as he went on, because he probably needed to say it, to let it out.  Eventually, he raised his voice, rambling about why she was keeping it from him, and Agnes had to defend her side of the story.

“I didn’t tell you, yes. But I didn’t tell anyone but Victoria.” She confessed, getting herself ready for that lie she had thought of in case Hunter - or anyone else, really - ever asked. “You would have noticed, everyone would have. I’m not an idiot, Hunter.” She told him, letting the camera hang around her neck and crossing her arms against her chest. She was super pregnant, there was no way she could hide it. "I had to tell the father first, don’t you think? Surely, after him, everyone else would find out at different times.” There, the lie was starting to form. He was panicking, it made Agnes regret anything she’d ever done with him, but it also made it easier to lie to him. He didn’t deserve the burden of her mistake, even though it was also his mistake. Life had fucked him up pretty badly already, he didn’t need this. With that in mind, with the image of a guy she appreciated more than any other being so close to the edge of crumbling down, Agnes continued, “Hunter, look. You don’t have to take care of my kid. You don’t have to help me in any way, let alone financially.” She walked up to him, just so that she could see him clearer, “I’ve got it figured out. He’s due in July, so I’ll be out of school. My mama and brother will help me out, and...well, I’ve been selling some of my photographs. It’s helped a bit, but that’s what I want to do in a later time, so I think now’s as good a time as any to start.”

Looking at him, keeping eye contact to make it more believable, she sighed. “Hunter, Aoife doesn’t care about me or my kid. She has no reason to care. Your relationship will be fine.” It was scary, truthfully scary, how the only unselfish thing Agnes had ever done was to keep Hunter happy. It was so he could have his life back together, without having to worry whether or not there was enough food for a child, or whether this brand of diapers was more expensive than the rest. These were adult responsibilities. Hunter wasn’t an adult. Neither was Agnes, but she at least had a reason to try and act like one. Or rather, she had an obligation to act like so. That was the thing about pregnancies; the girl was stuck with the whole thing, whether she wanted to or not, the guy was able to walk away either willingly or unwillingly. Hearing him apologize was something different, and even though she greatly appreciated the effort it took for him to say it, she shrugged it off. “It’s alright, I suppose. It’s not your fault.” she gave him a slight hint of a smile, before bursting into full laughter. “You panicked! You were shit scared! Oh, Hunter!” There, that was enough. That would show him she was the regular Agnes, the one who laughed at him most of the time.

What the hell? Was she being sarcastic? Seriously? Hunter glared at her, anger rising in his chest. "Agnes, this isn't funny!" he replied furiously. "It isn't something to joke about!" But her next words threw him off just enough to stop his pacing, and he looked at her as though she'd grown two heads. Had to tell the father first? "Yeah, well, I don't exactly know how to break it to you Agnes, but you fucked that part up a bit already," he retorted angrily, completely ignoring the hypocrisy that he'd just yelled at her for using sarcasm herself. What the hell was going on? Was she on something? Or was being pregnant just making her delusional? It really didn't matter, because finding out that she was pregnant had made Hunter delusional enough himself that he really didn't pay much attention to the fact that she was making no sense. Because none of this shit made any sense. The fucking world didn't make sense! And the idea that Hunter and Agnes could have anything to do with a baby made the least sense of all.

But before he could voice any of his confusion, Agnes just went and made it more confusing by saying that he didn't have to help her. But just as he was about to comment on it - to protest - she was talking about when the kid was due and her plan for how she was going to take care of it, and just listening to her talk about it made the color drain from Hunter's face because she sounded like a fucking responsible adult and they weren't! Of course, technically, they were, but they weren't. They were teenagers. Students. Not parents! And Hunter's panic raced through his blood at the sight of Agnes, who had already come to terms with the unfairness of the situation - accepted it. She'd already started to become who she would have to be. It made it seem so much more real, and Hunter instantly knew that it wouldn't be that easy. Not for him. How could somebody who was so accustomed to taking advantage of people - to pushing away his problems - possibly put something so completely unwanted in his life before himself?

And Agnes was still talking. And she was so calm and how the fuck could she be that calm and what the hell was she even saying? "No reason? Agnes are you fucking kidding?!" She was still making no sense, and Hunter had no idea what to even ask at this point, so he just stared at her with a mix of confusion and panic and anger and god knows what else, just waiting for her to say anything at all that would make anything that she was saying easier to understand. But no, she didn't. She just went on about how it wasn't his fault, and that was just as ridiculous as anything that she'd said so far. "Not my fault?!" he repeated incredulously, turning to look at Agnes, who had at some point during his panic come to stand within a few feet of him. "Agnes, how the fuck is this possibly not my fault - " But even as the words escaped his mouth, his brain finally - finally - began to actually wrap around them. Not his fault.

Instantly, he repressed the rush of relief that threatened to wash over him. Because holy fuck, if this was a joke - if that wasn't what she meant - there was no way he'd make it out of this room without breaking just about everything inside of it, aside from Agnes. Not if he let himself believe, for even half a second, that what she was suggesting was even possible. "Not my fault," he repeated again, this time a bit more calmly - and also with a strong hint of doubt. "It's not - it isn't mine?" Just saying it was dangerous, and he couldn't help the small bit of hope in his stomach. And then, instantly, he felt guilty for it. Because if it wasn't his, then whose was it? If it wasn't his - where did that leave Agnes? But no, he wouldn't believe it. Not yet. Because it still just didn't make sense. "Agnes, come on, how can you know that?" he said, his voice skeptical. "I mean, we've been pretty - consistent," he pointed out. Even if she'd been sleeping with someone else, how did she know who it actually belonged to?

In an effort to keep the lie up, to not give her any reason to doubt her,Agnes raised an eyebrow. "No...I didn't fuck it up." She told him, and it almost spunded convincing to her, in a different way than it did to Hunter. "I sent him an owl a few weeks ago." She reassured, becoming more and more worried with each passing second that Hunter may decide to not believe a word she was saying, and then what would she do? She didn't want anything from him. She wasn't going to demand anything from him, but he was reckless and hot-headed, and it just occured to her that he was much more dangerous than she ever could be. But, would Hunter actually hurt her? Hell, he would. Their very first meeting proved her point.

Seeing Hunter's pale, sickened face, Agnes thought about slapping him. "Why do you look so sick?" she demanded, "I'm carrying a human inside of me. What the fuck did you think I would do? Sell it in that muggle web thing?" Agnes didn't get it, it wasn't his problem. Rather, Agnes made sure that this wasn't his problem. Taking a harsher approach, simply because she couldn't stand seeing Hunter anymore, she glared at him. "I don't even know why the fuck you're acting like an animal. It's just a kid! I fucked up, yes. I will have a screaming reminder of that for about seventeen years so I would really appreacite some sensibility from your part." It was hard to just stand there, looking atg him and trying to keep a huge lie together, because at some point she had obviously grown to care for Hunter. Not in the way she had cared for Evan or Chasen, no. If he needed saving from a fire, she would try. If he needed shelter, she would give it to him. If he needed help saving Ariel or Aoife from said fire, she would help him. She didn't expect anything in return, not because Agnes had let go of her selfish ways but because she knew Hunter was just as selfish.

Hunter repeated her words, and, rolling her eyes again, she replied, "Honestly, Hunter. I went back to Paris and my father died, my brother almost quit everything, and my mother cried for weeks. Then, I find out about this-" Agnes pointed at her stomach, which was, to her, a mixture of disgust, shock, excitement, confusion and love. "I've said it before, and I will say it again. You are not the center of the world. Right now, you thinking he's yours is the least thing on my mind." Agnes was still trying to lie, as best as she could, but she was tired of his shit. She was tired of everyone's shit. Ansel's shit. The doctor's shit. Her mother's shit. Everybody's. "No, he's not yours." Agnes breathed, too mentally and emotionally tired to keep up with Hunter. "Look... She sighed, moving aside her camera from her front and looking at him, I know he's not yours because the last time it happened, I was already...you know. Healers know these things, Hunter. The dates and everything, it doesn't add up to you. It adds up to someone else."

"If you want to help, I'll appreaciate it. I won't force you to anything, because he is not your responsability. He's mine." Rubbing her eyes, Agnes realized how much the baby felt hers, not Hunter's. Hunter just felt like another person who'd found out, nothing else. Was it always like this? Young girls with kids, did they always end up with the full burden? And, was this baby even a burden anymore? He'd certainly been so in the beginning, but Agnes was changing. She wasn't half as childish as she had been, problems that had at some point crushed her entire world, sent it into a whirlwind, meant nothing to her now. She was on a different level than Hunter was. He needed to graduate to, well, graduate. She needed to graduate to get training and a job and money for baby food and diapers and clothes. He could party and drink all he wanted, and she would have to carry her kid everywhere she went. It was still unfair, Agnes concluded, that she was born a girl.